My baby and happily ever after...

My baby did not make it. It came out prematurely stillborn. As if this wasn't sad enough, my dad died soon after in a workhouse. Then it was just me and mother, and we moved to the edge of town.
So, in the end it all came down to one conclusion. I was endeed loved, but "Love is only as good as it's lover".
"Wicked people love wickedly, violent people love violently, weak people love weakly, stupid people love stupidly, but the love of a free man is never safe." p.206

Me and My Friend

I was talking to my imaginary friend, one day, and she was critizing me for always looking in the mirror. I was just admiring my blue eyes though, and I think she wasjust being jealous.
Everyone is jealous and will not look at me, including my mother, because my eyes are blue and beautiful. And I can no longer go to school because people are prejudice of my blue eyes.
Then my friend started talking about my dad, and said he raped me, made me have sex with him. Then my friend tried to tell me I enjoyed it the second time, which got me angry.

Summer...Pregnant with dad's baby

Well... I was part of the Summer talk. Even Claudia and Frieda heard. I got inpregnated by my dad. He ran after he did this though, so people are disgusted of his actions and look down and blame me.
When mother found me she almost beat me to death. Everyone thinks my unborn baby should not live and Claudia and Frieda feel really bad for me, and they tried to help me. They prayed for me and sacrificed their marigold seeds and money. I really don't know what to think.

Bob.. can you give me Blue Eyes?

Bob lives in the back room of an eldery lady's house, Bertha Reese. She has a dog, which Bob is totally disgusted with. He wants to poison the dog, but couldn't even get near it.
I went over to Bob's and asked him if he woud give me blue eyes. He looked happy I asked him, and so he said if I fed the dog some meat, and it reacts, my wish would be granted.
I threw the dog meat, and watched carefully. The dog convulses and dies, and I ran with my brand new eyes.

Spring: Henry touches Frieda

Spring has finally arrived. I was helping my mom at one of her rich houses she cleans on the other side of town. I was in the garden when Frieda showed up. She said that she was "reuined" because Henry touched her breasts. Her father and mother were furious and her father shot at him. Rosemary said her father would go to jail for that, and Frieda hit her.
I have nieghbors; China and Poland, and everybody says they are "reuined" and Frieda thinks she was going to be like them and become fat. But as she was explaining this to me I accidently hit the fresh Peach Cobbler off the counter, and my mom beat me.

Jr killed a Cat!

I was walking home through the park when Junior, Geraldine's son approached me. He is always looking for attention because his mother only has love for the house cat. His mother only allowed him to hang out with the "upper class people" so I was already probably not supposed to be there, but Junior lured me into the house to see some kittens. When we go in he throws his cat at me, and I wanted to leave, but he locks me in. I was almost about to cry and I was scared until the cat rubbed up against me. I pet him and began to smile. When Junior saw this he swung the cat, and I tried to save him, but he hit the heater and died. His mother came in and yelled at me. She called me a "nasty little black bitch". Worst day ever.

Winter: New Girl comes to town

Maureen Paul is her name. She is beautiful and rich. She is light-skinned, not like me, and all the school boys were all over her. Claudia and Frieda said she had a dog tooth and stubbs where her sixth fingers used to be though. But anyway, I was walking home and boys were picking on me and harassing me, like usual, and then the MacTeer girls came to help, and just jumped into the fight. The boys would have fought back but Maureen came up, and they didn't want to fight in front of her. After she bought me an ice cream, and then asked me if I had ever seen my dad naked. She kept pushing it, and Claudia and Frieda said she was boy crazy and to cut it out. She responded that they were Black and ugly. Frieda actually ponders as if she thought it was true. I think it is.

Oh Great.. Monthly Gift.

I got my period for the first time, this Saturday afternoon. I was upset and asked Frieda for help. She was attempting to attach a pad to my dress, when the nieghbor, Rosemary Villanucci called Mrs. MacTeer and said we were "playing dirty". She beats you first and asks questions later. But once she realized what had happened, she helped me. What an embarresing day.

The MacTeers: Early Autumn

For now, I am staying with the MacTeers while my father is in jail. He will be out soon though. In the meantime, the MacTeers are pretty nice. There are two girls about my age, Claudia and Frieda. Claudia is a very interesting person at nine years old. She is very strong minded, and is a rebel. She hates how black people are treated and viewed opposed to white people, and would fight or rebel about anything you do that didn't please her. Frieda though is the older sister, she 10. She is a rebel, like Claudia, but she is a little more mature and connected with the adults in her community. Mrs. MacTeer is the ultimate mom. She is loving, strict, and protective over her children. Mr. MacTeer is definently the breedwinner, fiercly protective over his daughters and always keeps his family clothed and fed. I wish my family was like thiers.